The Ultimate Rejection Letter

Herbert A. MillingtonChair - Search Committee412A Clarkson Hall, Whitson UniversityCollege Hill, MA  34109

Dear Professor Millington,

Thank you for your letter of March 16.  After careful consideration, Iregret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer mean assistant professor position in your department. 

This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusuallylarge number of rejection letters.  With such a varied and promising fieldof candidates, it is impossible for me to accept all refusals. 

Despite Whitson's outstanding qualifications and previous experience inrejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs atthis time.  Therefore, I will assume the position of assistant professorin your department this August.  I look forward to seeing you then. 

Best of luck in rejecting future applicants.

Sincerely,Chris L. Jensen